Why Autistic People's Food Preferences Matter

By: Gracie Wise

Sushi night with a friend! Shocking--I know.

You know what really grinds my gears?

When people who don't know how autistic brains work claim they know autistics better than they know themselves. It's funny, given we're the ones who've been that way since birth.

I could name all the autistic traits that are often shamed and judged by neurotypicals and allistics (i.e., non-autistic individuals), but I want to talk about one in particular that's unfairly stigmatized:

Our food aversions and food preferences (colloquially dubbed safe foods by online autistic communities).

Food Preferences Are More Universal Than We Think

Personally, I think we're all picky eaters to some degree, regardless of neurotype. We have our likes, dislikes, favorite store brands—you get the picture.

We also have different eating styles. Think about how you eat your fries, for instance. You might squirt ketchup all over your fries. Perhaps you like to dip them in ketchup (like I do). Some like to dip them in ketchup mixed with mayo. Others don't like ketchup at all.

Quite often, people have a preference for different cuts and textures of fries (curly, crinkly, thick, thin, crispy, soft, etc.). Some like their fries heavily seasoned, plain, sweet, or topped with cheese, gravy, or chili. Others like to dip their fries in milkshakes.

And believe it or not, some like their fries cold.

Our gastronomic experiences are subjective, which goes without saying that there's no right or wrong way to enjoy your fries.

But Autistic Food Preferences Are a Whole Other Ball Game

If you grew up autistic, you probably know that food preferences are more than just simply texture and flavor.

It's about predictability, familiarity, control, and safety.

We typically like foods that are consistent in texture, shape, and flavor, which is why junk foods like chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, and pizza are usually our go-to safe foods for satisfying our dietary needs.

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Disclaimer: While these are common safe foods for autistic individuals, the idea that every single autistic on the planet eats them is a stereotype. Sometimes, safe foods can be things that would surprise non-autistic people, thus shattering the narrative declaring chicken nuggets as the international symbol of autism.

For example, some of my "unconventional" safe foods include but aren't limited to:

• Tteokbokki (spicy rice cakes)

• Chips and spicy salsa with guacamole

• Brie cheese

• Kombucha

• Sushi-grade tuna

• Raw onions

• Grilled octopus

In other words, some autistics will only eat a limited selection of foods, while others have more adventurous palates (like me). Shocking, I know!

Remember: if you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person. Autistics don't exist in one big monolith.

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Which is why branching out beyond our safe foods is tricky at best and distressing at worst. When we're presented with something that has a strong odor or taste, a discomforting texture, or a certain color, we either hesitate or flat-out refuse.

And when a certain food turns out to be unsafe for us, we have a strong, visceral reaction to it.

Believe it or not, I used to be really selective with food. Taken at Chuck E. Cheese in 2004.

Food Aversions Are Not Picky Eating

At some point in my early childhood, I started to dislike eggs for some reason. I just couldn't stand the strong, sulfuric smell that they emit (whether they were fried or scrambled)—even the taste alone made me physically ill!

Any attempts at trying to like eggs again ended in failure. I remember when I was in first grade, I asked my mom to make me some scrambled eggs for breakfast once. I was only a few, measly bites in when I started feeling extremely nauseous and stopped eating them altogether.

I wanted to throw up.

At some point, I stopped trying altogether and just faced the facts:

• I will never eat eggs again. I won't force myself to eat something that my body physically rejects.

• I will never like eggs again. I wish I could (considering they're packed with Vitamin D and Vitamin B12), but I can't.

• If I want those vitamins, I can get them from alternative sources that I eat (fish, mushrooms, berries, etc.).

And I still don't like eggs to this day. When I was eating breakfast at a restaurant in Savannah, I ordered avocado toast (which can be a hit or miss with me, depending on the place) without eggs. I'm not sure if the waiter forgot, the chef made a mistake, or if I accidentally didn't mention it.

Whatever the case, it came with eggs. Nope, nope, nope!

It literally made no difference if the eggs in question were egg whites or if I scraped it off. I could still taste the residue of eggs on my toast, so I just did what I always do when an unsafe ingredient touches my food: I didn't eat it, plain and simple.

Did I go hungry until lunch time, despite trying to fuel myself with the berries that came with my meal? Maybe. But if I had to choose between running on an empty stomach and puking my guts out from eating something contaminated with eggs, I'd rather starve, thank you very much.

Food Aversions Are a Nervous System Response

This is why I get so annoyed when non-autistics scoff at our sensory sensitivities when it comes to food. I can't stand it when a grown-up tells parents of autistic children that they'll eat when they're hungry. You also have non-autistic people who make fun of autistic adults' safe foods, calling them "picky" or "childish."

Even worse, some autism experts, healthcare providers, nutritionists, and other parents think it's okay to trick autistics into eating their unsafe foods, whether it's lying about ingredients or sneaking veggies into their safe foods. This won't encourage autistic individuals to try new things or like something, but it can further limit their menu and make them lose all trust in you.

Forcing autistic children to eat their unsafe foods, especially if they've already had a bad experience with said foods, is another level of cruelty I can't wrap my head around since it can lead to a lifetime of trauma and eating disorders.

And if you're trying to justify this kind of behavior, ask yourself: if you were making cookies for someone who had a peanut allergy, would you sneak peanuts into the batter, assuming they'll overcome their peanut allergy?

Of course not. Besides, doing so would lead to legal and lethal consequences. So why subject autistics to that kind of torture?

I wasn't kidding when I told you I was a selective eater! Taken in 2002.

But I Want My Child to Be Healthy!

Every good parent wants their children to get enough nutrients in order to stay healthy. Having too much or too little of something can lead to serious health consequences, so it's understandable if you're concerned about your child's eating habits and you're not sure what to do.

But no amount of force-feeding or tampering with safe foods is going to address your child's sensory needs. There are better ways to address this issue without making mealtimes a stressful ordeal. If you're trying to introduce new foods to your child's plate, you can:

• Place different foods on the table when it's time to eat (a bowl of salad, for example). Leaving the door open for your child is much more effective than using punitive measures.

• Experiment with different cooking styles. For some autistic individuals, whether they'll eat something is a matter of how it's made. For example, I like freshly-sliced strawberries in my crêpes, but canned, puréed strawberries? Nope, nope, nope.

• Try making it fun! Turning pancakes into smiley faces, cutting sandwiches into heart shapes, and making pictures with fruits and veggies can make a world of difference. In Peppa Pig, there's an episode where the Pig family tries to encourage George (who I'm convinced is autistic) to eat his veggies. Turning his plate into a dinosaur (his special interest) does the trick; he happily cleans off his plate and is rewarded with a piece of chocolate cake. For a show with episodes that can be a hit or miss, that episode IMHO did a spectacular job at encouraging kids to try new foods.

With that being said, it's important to remember that there are days when it's hard or even impossible to expand our palates. Autistics' eating habits and food preferences can fluctuate depending on executive function, interoception, sensory integration, and other internal and external factors.

There's a reason why I'm so grossed out sometimes by foods I usually don't mind eating! I can't even bring myself to help myself to leftovers (there are exceptions, though), knowing full well the strong odor from the refrigerator, cold temperatures, and soggy textures are going to assault my sense of touch and smell.

When autistics don't have the capacity to try something new or fix something for themselves to eat at home, sometimes, the best option is to eat our safe foods, whether it's a frozen pizza, a fast food joint, takeout from our favorite restaurants, or just a plain ole sandwich.

Does that mean feeding your autistic child pizza and chicken nuggets every single day? No way. It's about meeting your child where they're at, offering safer alternatives on the hard days and being their cheerleader on the good.

And on those hard days, fed really is best.

Eating on Our Own Terms

You might be wondering, How did I, an autistic woman, acquire such an exquisite palate?

There are so many factors: I came from a family where food was an integral part of our lives. I ate out very often. My curiosity and sensory-seeking taste buds make things a little easier. Sometimes, it was just as simple as explaining the texture of a food. If my sister Maggie never told me that hummus had a texture similar to peas (which are my favorite vegetable, mind you), I'd probably never like the hummus they serve at Saj.

Whatever the case, it's because I ate whatever I felt like eating on my own terms, at my own time. It took years for me to expand my horizons, I tell you—years!

It's possible that your autistic child—whether they're three or 32—will stretch out of their dietary comfort zone, too. When they have the skills to try new foods, they will.

Who knows? You might be surprised by what they eat.